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Name: Matt
Posts by mattshacleford:
Niche Society: The Double By-Pass
March 20th, 2010I’ll be continuing the food theme with this week’s blog post of another horrible item that should never be consumed by humans. With that being said two of our regular case-mate cast of characters (Ian and Jeremy) plus one brave non-pork eater, Tommie embarked on a quest as challenging as Frodo’s of throwing the ring into a volcano, or Harry and Lloyd’s road trip to Aspen to drop off a suitcase. They made the attempt to ingest the Double Bypass Burger at the Vortex Bar and Grill here in Atlanta.
For those of you that aren’t familiar with the Vortex Bar and Grill and their infamous Double Bypass Burger I’ll fill you in. The Double Bypass Burger consists of 1 pound of sirloin patty, topped with two fried eggs, six slices of American cheese, and eight slices of bacon, all served between the two grilled cheese sandwiches used in place of the regular hamburger buns.
Ian and Jeremy had their sights set on the OG Double Bypass Burger, and Tommie, who doesn’t eat pork, substituted the sirloin for a nice turkey burger.
Before game time I caught up with the guys and asked them a couple pre-game questions.
Going into the Double Bypass Burger (DBB) how are you feeling?
Ian: well I’ve been training pretty intensely for the past couple months, so I feel like I can tame this beast.
Jeremy: A little intimidated… I mean, wouldn’t you be?
Tommie: Pumped and ready to devour the beast!
How long have you been training for this day?
Ian: Like I said, a couple of months…
Jeremy: My whole life, this is the moment I was born for. Anything that happened before today and anything that happens after does not matter.
Tommie: Haven’t. Don’t need to. I got this.
If one word could describe what’s going through your head what would it be?
Ian: Sassafras
Jeremy: Destroyed!! Everyone that knows me knows “DESTROYED” is my victory phrase.
Tommie: Diabetes.
If you were to compare the DBB to a mythical creature what would it be?
Ian: The great Minotaur of the Labyrinth of Crete. It’s horns being the grilled cheese sandwich buns that could very well be the weapon that keeps me defeating this monster.
Jeremy: After I conquer this burger I will wield it’s powers, much like the head of Medusa.
Tommie: Big Foot.
How much film have you watched on the DBB, and have you reached out to any of its former challengers?
Ian: I’ve watched much film on this challenge and I’ve tried my hardest to get into the minds of the past champions that have defeated this beast, like Sam “Surly” Sanders and Bob “The Belcher” Higgins, I will try to do them proud and support their honor.
Jeremy: None. I am a freelancer. I’m a professional. This will be a victory belonging to myself with no outside influences… Why? Do you have any tips?
Tommie: None. I got this!
Have you ever done anything like this before?
Ian: I have only ever tried amateur events held in local Waffle Houses and IHOPS, never anything that measures up to this feat.
Jeremy: Yes, this is the first time that I’ve done it without some sort of video camera, alcohol induced bet or girls to try to impress. This one is for me.
Tommie: No, but I still got this!
What is your strategy on gameday? Do you eat or do you hold out for the DBB tonight?
Ian: So far, I’m just trying to eat light until the event. Lunch will consist of 3 ribs left over from last nights training session.
Jeremy: I’ve been eating all day. It’s the same strategy that I use the week before Thanksgiving. People who starve themselves before an event like this are really hurting themselves. I hope none of my competitors are seriously injured, but that will teach them to step in the ring with me.
Tommie: I will run on the treadmill for 20 min. today, burn 250 cals. Yeah Baby!
Do you like jazz?
Ian: Only traditional, old-school jazz, not that free-for-all jam session crap that loops for hours and hours.
Jeremy: I do. I can’t tell you the name of one jazz artist. But I like it. Reminds me of the time I went to New Orleans and didn’t come back for 3 fuzzy months. I still don’t know what the happened there…
Tommie: Heck yeah. Nina Simone. Hello!
We all know about the challenge the DBB brings to the table, but have you left out or underestimated the dark horse that is the tots (served as a non-negotiable side)?
Ian: I’m sorry, but the cheesy-cheese goo covered fries + tots that accompany the super-stack heart attack burger are a mountain all on their own; I’m not sure if I can ever climb that.
Jeremy: That is actually my greatest concern. Tots tend to expand as you eat them and I don’t think my competition understands the seriousness of this tot-expansion.
Tommie: Yeah, but that doesn’t scare me or does it? I got to fart.
If you do conquer the DBB what will you do? (Please don’t say “Go to Disney World,” if anything Knotts Berry Farm would be a great choice)
Ian: I first plan on starting my 6 month tour around the southeast promoting my memoir, “The Monster in Me”, from there I plan on reaching out to the less fortunate and helping their abilities to eat large quantities of food, which should last another 6 months. After all is said and done, I will cast aside all of my earthly possessions and start my pilgrimage. Along the way I will join forces with the Dalai Lama and spread our powers of peace. Then, I’ll probably just have a Coke.
Jeremy: It will take several days to pass all of the cholesterol through my system, much like the time I chugged a gallon of ice cold milk. Strange things happen to your body after events like these. So I’ll be laying low for a while.
Tommie: Gloat in my victorious stomach pains.
One last question, do you have any questions?
Ian: No? Wait… Can I have a second to think about this?… Oh, alright…
Jeremy: Huh?
Tommie: Yeah. Who had time to make this questionnaire. Get back to work.
So that’s what was racing through their heads before the match and here are some photos of what went down.
Ian and Tommie both finished their Double Bypass Burger, unfortunately Jeremy wasn’t so lucky and the beast did the taming. Although coming up short, Jeremy is still a winner, and Ian and Tommie will forever stand as reigning champions over the Double Bypass Burger.
Niche Society – Office Hacking Part 3: Do you have Snack Factor?
March 4th, 2010This weeks Niche Society is a V-LOG (its basically when you do a blog, but you use a recordable video device to capture movements and words, and broadcast it over the Internet using a state of the art technology known as YouTube, this process is very expensive so I hope you guys enjoy it).
We have a vending machine at the office, so some co-workers and I decided to break down ALL the snacks and rank them 1, 2, 3 along with a People’s Choice. So watch the V-LOG and send it to all your friends.
Niche Society: Office Hacking, Part 2 – Hot Dogs
February 26th, 2010So I’m back, sorry it’s been a few weeks since my last post. I was out in Vegas last week for MAGIC, a streetwear fashion trade show and this week I had the black plague. But alas I’m back here at the old bullpen delivering you this week’s Niche Society.
Last time I shared how to hack great coffee at your desk with everyday materials. This week I’ve employed the help of a special guest, Jeremy Jones, one of our graphic designers. Jeremy has a creation called ‘Super Hot Dogs’ and I will show you how to assemble them with the minimum office kitchen facilities.
Ingredients: 1 medium plumb, juicy red tomato; 1 crisp, pungent red onion; 1 jar of Claussen pickle spears; 1 large plastic container of off brand Mayonnaise; 1 delicious, buttery smooth avacado; 1 packet of Smithyfield down home off the farm succulent hickory smoked bacon; 1 package of Kroger brand white flour hot dog buns; 1 package of very rare Oscar Meyer hot dogs; and one blue plate.
Step 1: Take a paper towel, place it in the microwave carefully throw 3 pieces of Smithyfield down home off the farm succulent hickory smoked bacon onto the paper towel and cook for 2.5 minutes.
Step 2: Slice your plumb red tomato, pungent onion, buttery smooth avacado into spears mimicking the spear shape of the Claussen pickle spears. Also place the Smithyfield down home off the farm succulent hickory smoked bacon on the blue plate.
Step 3: Take your very rare Oscar Meyer hot dogs, place them on a paper towel and cook those little dogs for 1 minute.
Step 4: Add the dogs, the Smithyfield down home off the farm succulent hickory smoked bacon, ketchup and mayo to the bun.
Step 5: Carefully assemble your Claussen pickle spears, avacado, red onion and plump tomato on the Super Hot Dog.
Step 6: Eat every last bit, except three very large crumbs.
I hope you enjoyed this edition of Office Hacking, I’ll see you guys next week for the BEST – and the final – version of Office Hacking.
Niche Society: Office Hacking, Part 1 – Coffee
February 11th, 2010This week’s post marks the start a three part series entitled “Office Hacking.” Now, you’re probably asking yourself, “What is office hacking?” It’s all about taking what you have at your office and making the very most out of it, through slight modifications and small tools. So, this three part series will be all about how to make the most out of cubical life, and squeeze every little drop of enjoyment out of it.
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I enjoy coffee just like every other American, but unfortunately my taste buds have been awakened to the taste of delicious coffee. I can’t and I won’t settle for the regular office sludge, I need good coffee. The problem is I just don’t have the time to swing by my favorite place in Atlanta (octanecoffee.com) to have a cappuccino before work. Some people say “just go to Starb***s and get coffee.” Well, I’d rather hold onto my $4 rather than choking down an old, burnt espresso and boiled milk. I might sound harsh and opinionated about my coffee, but once you’ve had black you’ll never go back!
My solution? The “pour over.” I’ll show you a step by step process of how to get a great cup of coffee, in under 5 minutes. The most important thing is the beans, it’s all about the beans. I usually use Counter Culture beans that I pick up from from Octane. If you let them know your using it for a pour over they’ll grind it accordingly for you for no charge. The only other things you need are a simple plastic pour over and filters, both of which you can get at your local Kroger (or other grocery store) for about $10 for both.
Next, just pre-wet the filter to get the paper taste out before putting your beans in.
Put your ground beans into the filter and start pouring hot water onto the grounds in a circular motion to bloom the grounds. After it blooms, continue pouring the water in a circular motion until your water is out. I usually use around 8 oz. of water, per couple of spoonfuls.
Note: It’s no exact science, more grounds = stronger coffee, less = weaker, try it out ’til you find your perfect combo!
And voila! A nice tasty, cup of coffee to get the day started off right!
I hope you have enjoyed this week’s entry of Niche Society stay tuned for more “Office Hacking” next week!
Niche Society: Chasing Legends
February 3rd, 2010So, here is my second post for Niche Society, and I have another movie trailer to share, but I promise I wont be doing movies every week! When I saw this trailer on Hypebeast I knew I had to blog about it.
Chasing Legends (http://chasinglegends.com/trailers/) is an intense behind the scenes look at the Tour de France. The movie looks like it features last year’s Tour de France, when Astana rider Alberto Contador took the coveted victory.
I’m particularly excited about this film because I’ve been following the Tour and cycling since I was 14 and there hasn’t ever been an in-depth look quite like this before. Just watching the trailer you get a feel of how heavy the burden this race creates for the competitors, and how grueling it actually is. I think this going to be great for cycling and exposing it to the masses, and help open the eyes of people who know nothing about the Tour or the sport in general.
I’m sure it wont disappoint.
Niche Society: Banksy Film
January 28th, 2010Hello, I have been privileged to be given the task from the Gods of everything online to write a blog post for case-mate.com! As just a precursor to future blogging adventures, I wanted to give you a taste of what’s to come.
(This is where you would insert a brilliantly edited montage of snip-its from the future.)
Niche Society is going to be all about ‘niche’ stuff. Stuff that I love and appreciate ranging from amazing design, new gadgets (not just tech related), interesting projects that people are working on, and generally anything that is worth talking about or looking at.
So, here is my first ever post, I’m going to keep this one short since its the first one.
Here’s a trailer for a “Exit Through the Gift Shop,” a new film featuring the well known and controversial artist Banksy that will premiere at Sundance. Banksy is a street artist from the UK, and has become famous for his controversial imagery all around London and the World. In my opinion, Banksy is one of the most influential and innovative artists in recent history. His medium isn’t one you can find at an art supply store unless you go outside and look at the brick walls.
I can’t wait to see this film, and to get an in-depth look into Banksy and how he does his work! Banksy has been one of those figures who has managed to stay in the shadows and out of the public eye, so this film will be a real treat into seeing the method behind his madness.
