It is amazing the things you can accomplish in the morning before work and still be on time.
Brush teeth ✓
Police officers in my living room ✓
Yes I said police officers, yes that’s plural.
8:15 a.m. I was blow-drying my hair.
8:25 a.m. I opened the front door to let Weagle, my dog go outside.
8:35 a.m. As I was starting to get dressed for the day, Weagle began to bark uncontrollably (not uncharacteristic for him) so half dressed I turned the corner to find TWO fully uniformed men in blue standing in my hallway yelling FREEZE; POLICE!
They were IN my HOUSE, not outside my house, knocking on the door. Apparently, someone called 911 from my house. The irony is I do not have a land line, just a cell phone. I told the officers this and their only response was, “We need to see proof of I.D. that you live here.” So, just my luck, I couldn’t find my drivers license. Finally, I walked outside to my car and find it. After validating my residence one of the cops radio’d the operator to get the phone number that called. He repeated it out loud to me like I was supposed to lead him in the right direction. Of course, I did not recognize the number.
8:45 a.m. The officers were squeezing their way out of my locked gate (best part of the whole experience).
9:00 a.m. I slid into my desk like Tom Cruise in Risky Business, not a minute late, no thanks to the po-po, 5-0, pigs, fuzz, bacon, boys in blue, cops, dogs, feds, flat foot, Johnny law, LEO, narcs…